An Open Letter To Yankee Spammer Scum
Blathering in my mailbox about "Thanksgiving", whatever that may be, isn't going to workl. Unlike spammer scum, I am grateful for all kinds of things throughout the year, and not just on the third Monday after the Wednesday in November on which the Holy Yak vomited, and do not feel any need to demonstrate my gratitude by buying meat/chocolate/booze/handguns/SUVs for my nearest and dearest.
Well, maybe the booze. And the meat. But handguns are Right Out. Civilised people use swords.